So this week, as part of the Be Transformed series, we’re talking about relationships, specifically on how to find your tribe. Before we dive in on the tips, I want to address two important questions some of you are probably thinking right now. What the heck is a tribe? And why should I care?
Simply put, a tribe (the way many people use the word these days) refers to a community of people who share common interests, values, or beliefs. In other words, they’re like-minded people, so they get you. Think of the groups you might be a part of online: entrepreneur groups, blogging groups, writing groups, mom groups, etc. these can all be seen as a tribe.
Why is a Tribe Important
So why should you care?
Because joining a tribe whether you realize it or not can have a tremendous impact.
1 Cor. 15: 33 says “do not be deceived: ‘bad company corrupts good morals.’”We also know from the Bible that it is not good for us to be alone. We need community. Click To Tweet
Who you spend time with will affect your character. I go to a church that meets near the ASU campus, and we have a lot of college students in our church. One thing my pastor always says is “either you change the campus or the campus changes you.” We hear a lot of stories about freshmen that get to campus, and within the first 72 hours of being on campus, they begin compromising their values and beliefs to “fit in” with the culture on campus.
You might not be in college anymore, but that doesn’t mean you won’t succumb to the influence of the culture around you. Whether that’s at work or the groups you join or the friends you hang out with. We’re all vulnerable to be influenced by others, which is why it’s important who you surround yourself with and the relationships you make.
How to Pick Your Tribe:
1. Know What You’re Looking For & Find Like-Minded People
Identify the qualities, values, and/or interests that you have or want and search for groups that embody those qualities.
For instance, if following God and sharing the love of Jesus is important to you (which if you’re on this blog, I’m assuming that it is) then look for others that are also following Him and sharing the love of Jesus.
If you want to be a successful business owner, then look for other successful business owners that you can spend time with and learn from.
If you’re passionate about books and love reading—cause who doesn’t—then look for fellow book-lovers that share your passion and where you can engage with them in book discussions.
By the way, for all my book-loving friends, I do have a Youtube channel that talks about books. You can check it out here!
2. Finding Your Tribe Online and Off
Now that you’ve identified qualities, interests, or values you want to look for, it’s time to start finding your tribe.
Find Your Tribe on Facebook
As far as finding your tribe online, that seems to be the easy part. There are plenty of Facebook groups you can join just by searching the qualities or values you’re looking for.
For instance, if you’re looking for a group for Christian women who are business owners and entrepreneurs, you can search those exact words and find tons of groups to join.
You can also look at some of the groups your friends are in and see if any of those would interest you too. If you’re like me and you love to learn, you’ve probably signed up for some e-courses to learn a new a skill or subscribed to different podcasts and blogs. A lot of times these courses or podcasts/blogs have their own Facebook groups that you can join and meet others on a similar journey to yours.
Two groups that I’d recommend for Christian business owners and entrepreneurs are She Works His Way (swHw) FB group and the Kingdom Driven Entrepreneur group. This is a quote from the swHw website I think describes the community perfectly: “If you are a Jesus-loving business woman – you’ve found your tribe!” There is a $15 per month membership fee, but it also gives you access to all the new workshops they have. They put on four online workshops a month. I definitely think this is a valuable community to join.
The other FB community group I’d recommend is the Kingdom Driven Entrepreneurs. This group is also for Christian business owners and entrepreneurs, but it’s not focused on just women, like the first group. I also recommend the Kingdom Driven Entrepreneurs podcast if you haven’t listened to it yet. They give you so much encouragement and insight and helps you think about and look at your business differently. You can click here to check out their website. Also, the group and podcast are led by Shae Bynes who wrote the Grace Over Grind book, that I talked about in a previous post. If you missed that post, check it out here!
Now, of course, we can’t forget our favorite search engine: Google. Another easy way to find groups to join is to type in your keywords into google and see what it comes up with. This is also a great way to find groups offline to join as well. You can quickly search for your keywords but also include your location to find groups that meet in person. For instance, I searched for “Christian business owners groups in Phoenix, AZ” and found groups that meet up in different cities within the Phoenix area.
Networking Events & Workshops
Another way to find your tribe offline is to look at different events and workshops that may interest you. Are you a writer? Do you know of any writing workshops you can attend in your city? Are there any business conferences or networking events you’d be interested in attending?
Your Local Church
You can also look within your local church. Being a part of a local church can be a tribe in and of itself but within the local church take a look at some of the smaller groups you may be able to join. Is there a women’s ministry group at your church? How about a group of young professionals? Single moms?
When looking for your tribe, it’s a good idea to try to find smaller groups to join, especially for in-person groups. This will allow you to connect more and have a deeper relationship with the people within your group. Jesus may have had crowds of followers, but he only chose 12 disciples to go deeper in relationship with.
3. Stay Away From Negative People
I don’t know about you, but I get drained from being around negative people for too long. Maybe that’s because I’m usually very positive and optimistic. I’m always trying to get them to see the positive side of things—which doesn’t work—but it sucks the energy out of me.
Negative people, will constantly get you down and keep you from doing the things you’re meant to do. But don’t let them!
Now I get that some of the negative people in your life may be family members. You can’t always cut off family members entirely, but you can try to limit how much time you spend around them. Choose to spend more time with people that will support your God-given dreams.
4. Surround Yourself with Older and Younger Women
We should always be learning and growing, but we should also be constantly giving back to others. Surrounding yourself with older and younger women in your tribe allows you to do both.
There’s a lot of wisdom we can get from older women who have been where we are. I strongly believe in learning from other’s mistakes. Why go through the pain of learning something when you can learn from someone else’s experience? This also saves you time and energy and allows you to do what does work. We can also learn from their successes as well.
On the other end of the spectrum, we should always be giving back to the younger women in our lives. They are also looking to us as the older women in their lives to share our experiences with them. Plus there’s usually a sense of joy or fulfillment we get when we help others. I love being able to share what I learn with others; it’s one of the main reasons I love this blog.
To Sum It Up
Your tribe will have a significant impact on your life so make sure you choose it wisely. Now I know we covered a lot today so to sum it up how do you find your tribe:
- Identify the qualities you’re looking for in a tribe
- Find groups to join based on the qualities you’ve identified; you can find groups through
- FB groups
- Online searches
- Networking events and workshops
- Your local church
- Stay away from negative people
- Surround yourself with older and younger women
If you’re a Christian entrepreneur and you’re looking for a super cool tribe to join, make sure to check out the swHw community or the Kingdom Driven Entrepreneur community.
Don’t forget to download your free worksheets for this week’s topic on relational growth. Sign up below to get your worksheets.
Like I said earlier, we should always be giving back to others. So if you know of any super cool tribes you think others would love to hear about, leave a comment below. I would love to hear about what other tribes are out there.